The SBP Archives - Your less than frequent dose of SBP!

With the Indiana Jones craze in full force, I came across an Ebay auction where the seller (with zero feedback) was selling the infamous Idol of Fertility from Raiders of the Lost Ark with a starting bid of $75,000. It was apparently only "one of three" in existence. I can't substantiate that claim, but I can tell you one of them is at Planet Hollywood in Sydney, Australia. Come to think of it...didn't Planet Hollywood go under a few years ago? Hey, where is it now!? Anyway, in the fall of 1998 that's where it was, and it's been so long since I looked at this photo I've always remembered it with me being on the other side of the idol. Doesn't matter though...sweet prop to see in person to say the least!

Emerging from the rubble of this year's summer blockbusters, this trailer caught my attention during my regular web browsing. It might be accused of cashing in on the whole steroid craze as Barry Bonds & Roger Clemens are getting a lot of attention right now for all the wrong reasons, but if it's a solid film that's all I really care about. I know many that don't see the big deal if all athletes juice themselves up in the name of fortune & glory, but some, such as myself, just don't like the idea that these stars are sacrificing their long-term health while taking a short cut to win. It looks like this documentary is tackling this issue, and I for one am very curious to see the results. It's opening in limited release this Friday ("limited" just another term for "not playing in Ottawa"). You can see the trailer by clicking here.

I thought we were going to witness a memorable Stanley Cup final that would last 6 or 7 games with many heading to overtime, a battle of defence vs offence, the irresistible force meeting the immovable object, the past vs the future of the NHL...and so on. Instead, we get an ass-kicking, where two of the supposed best players in the NHL, Sydney Crosby & Evgeni Malkin, are nowhere to be seen. The defensive corps led by Swedish captain Nicklas Lidstrom is simply outplaying the Pittsburgh Penguins in every department. The Red Wings are the class of the NHL and are proving this beyond all expectations. And as NHL fans, we deserve better than what Pittsburgh is giving us.

Is there anything Pittsburgh can do to come back? You know, the way the series is being played out, it's kinda like the Senators earlier on, with the Penguins assuming that dubious distinction while Detroit flexes it's muscle as the Senators opponent, appearing ready to dispatch their opposition in four quick games. Certainly we should expect some life out of the Crosby show, no? Guess will see once the series heads to his hometown.

On the upside of this debacle (including a couple of hockey pool victories, thank you very much), I don't think we'll hear much more about Gary Roberts. Sportsnet ran a poll where they asked fans if a returning Roberts or the Red Wings' Johan Franzen would have the greatest impact as they return to their team for game 2. Keeping in mind Franzen was leading the playoffs in scoring until a head injury in the Conference final, 51% CHOSE FRICKIN' ROBERTS, a regular healthy scratch during these playoffs! Obviously, a lot of Leafs fans still think Roberts is in Toronto and it's 2001. Folks, that's embarrassing: Franzen is a scoring machine; Roberts needs to be put on life support. But God bless him for punching Franzen in the head knowing full well he had a concussion, or handing out some more fists to Pavel Datsyuk (yeah, Pavel is known for dropping the mitts, isn't he?) as the game was winding down. Toronto media and fans call him gritty...I call him a cheater. He didn't do anything of note except find himself in the penalty box.

We all talked about parity in the NHL and how every team is very close in competing with one another. That might hold true in a particular division or conference, but the way this final is playing out, I couldn't disagree more. It is very obvious who's the best, and who's not, in the 2008 edition of the battle for the Stanley Cup.

If you are fortunate enough to build a big stack of chips, you have the advantage of taking down pots uncontested and bullying smaller stacks with the threat of eliminating from the game. It is usually a good idea to always enter a pot raising so you can establish the psychological dominance immediately while other players decide whether or not to continue on with the hand.

The is especially true if you're one of the blinds or on the button, and everyone has folded to you. Now you have to consider your image to the other players while you decide if you'll carry on with the two cards in front of you: Have you played lots of pots, or are you somewhat tight? If you have a hand like J-9 and have played lots of pots, you probably want to pick another time to try to steal. If you've played relatively few pots, it might be okay to try to steal at this point.

If you decide to play the hand, I'd raise 90% of the time, maybe just call if there's a chronic blind "defender" who'll call with any two cards. But the point is to take advantage of being one of the big stacks, from time to time you should take your marginal hands and raise in efforts to get your smaller-stacked opponents to fold. Because they see you have the ability to knock them out of play, they'll show you much more respect if they decide to contest a pot. Those extra chips will come in handy as the blinds keep on rising.

Now if you're up against another big stack, depending on the way they're playing, I'd likely only want to get involved in a hand against them with premium cards. For example, if I'm holding Q-J suited and raise, but then get re-raised by this big stack, I'm pretty sure my cards are finding their way into the muck. Remember the purpose of raising with these types of hands: to bluff and steal chips. If your hand gets caught in the cookie jar against someone who can bust you while you still have a healthy chip count in the tournament, I'd pick a better spot and not be too stubborn to let the hand go.

On the other hand, against a much smaller stack, I might be willing to gamble a little more since there's no threat in busting out and you might be able to steal with a continuation bet if it's checked to you. Again, if you're wrong, you're still in the tournament.

Your chip stack is a critical component on how you play your hands and how others play against you.

There was something missing from the fourth installment of the Indiana Jones movies and I can't pinpoint what it is. When the credits rolled and the lights turned back on, I felt empty. No, I can't label Kingdom of the Crystal Skull a bad movie. It isn't. But then again, it isn't really a good movie, either. If this makes any sense: I can't recommend it, but at the same time, I'll likely see it again on DVD to see if I missed anything. If it was bad, I wouldn't bother. So it must be okay, right?

Let's talk about the good things: Harrison Ford, even at 65 years old, is still convincing as Indiana Jones. He's in tip-top shape and I could buy every fist fight and narrow escape he got himself into, and to be perfectly honest it was great seeing him again after 19 years back as Indy on the big screen. Karen Allen is fine returning as Marion Ravenwood (except for one scene with a very forced "Indieeeeeee" that will make you cringe), and I even didn't mind Shia Leboeuf's 1950s biker character. The intro scenes in Nevada (although I could have sworn they made a reference to New Mexico later on. Can someone walk from Nevada to New Mexico?) are well done in the flavour of the trilogy we all love (well, maybe not so much the red-headed step child that is Temple of Doom, although I liked it enough). The big chase scene, including a duel between Shia and Cate Blanchett is done well, complete with flesh eating ants to bookend the big chase.

But after that...I don't know. Then again, when I think of those action sequences, there isn't much tension because you really don't think for a second they won't get out of it unlike the thrilling steal-the-truck sequence in Raiders or the tank sequence in Last Crusade. I thought the story of chasing the crystal skull was convoluted and didn't make much sense. I thought the back story of the hundreds of years of people going after said skulls just added to the confusion. The ending itself, which I won't spoil, didn't really move me in any way. I mean in Last Crusade, I felt giddy. When Indy was in the room with all those grails, I was like, "Shit, one of those was touched by frickin' JESUS and Indy is gonna drink out of it!!!" But when the ending rolls around, and it's not terribly climatic in my opinion, I was like, "So what?" What was the point of this whole journey? What did ______ doing_____mean? If you go see it, maybe you can give me your two cents because I didn't get it.

Another thing that was annoying: CGI monkeys and ground hogs. Yup, you can tell Lucas had his say in this story.

I feel like a bit like a grump or something writing this. But trust me, I really really REALLY wanted to love this movie. But you know what...yeesh...I think this might be the worst of the four. You know what? Let me see it again.

It's clear that Lucas got his thumb into the pie but Speilberg did a good job of keeping it less than knuckle deep. A satisfying story with all the classic sets and puzzles you would expect.

- Johnny M.

Hey, who can argue with that review? I'm likely going to see it Friday night, and I'll give my two cents on it here.

After a few weeks, I finally finished GTA IV, and let me tell you if you didn't know already, it is one of the best games I've ever played. It keeps track of almost every statistic imaginable, so for your amusement, I thought I'd pass you along a chosen few:

Game complete: 65.17% (Yup, tons of side missions I haven't even touched)
Missions passed: 94
Missions failed: 62
Money: $754,934
Times busted: 16
Times died: 37
People killed: 823
Playing time: 52h12m6s
Addiction level: "Buying in bulk"
Longest non-stop game: 5h58m54s (this was the first time I played it)
Favourite radio station: Liberty Rock Radio 97.8
Least favourite radio station: International Funk
Days passed: 132
Cars stolen: 236
Bikes stolen: 9
Boats stolen: 14
Helicopters stolen: 1
Longest cop chase: 12m10s
Longest freefall: 80.9 ft
People run down: 237
Fires started: 68
Criminals killed: 73
Times got drunk: 8
Girls dumped: 3
Spent on prostitutes: $1,010
Spent at strip clubs: $800
Spent at gun shops: $22,570
Player image: Soccer Mom

SPOILER ALERT! DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO KNOW THE ENDING (ONE OF TWO) OF THE GAME:

One of the things that made the game so enjoyable is the writing. The cut scenes combined with your character's ability to use his cell phone to call up a friend to play darts, eat, go to a bar, etc. is a fun way to interact with the game and it gives the other characters a bit of heart. Especially with your cousin Roman, the person who talked you into moving to the fictional city of Liberty City in the first place. That is why when your character, Niko Bellic, witnesses the death of his cousin at his wedding, it is kind of sad. I mean, the next scene after Roman gets shot, Niko wakes up in their old apartment in his old clothes, with the words, "Roman, I am so sorry..." I felt genuinely bad! You can really feel for the guy, and after all the time you spent in the game, you don't want to see him gone. There is a second ending that I'll probably try to unlock to see what happens, but man, sad stuff. You can still finish the rest of the side missions after the main story is completed, and little touches like pulling up your cell phone and no longer seeing Roman's number available to be called...*sob*...excuse me while I get a tissue!

- Out of 180,000 people, my name was one of several that got drawn to have the right to purchase tickets for the Buffalo Bills games in Toronto. Now, the tickets are very expensive (just under $200 each is the average). But then again, selling them may not be a problem and actually profitable. I tracked a few Ebay listings and people are just selling the passwords for about $50 each! We'll see if I try to make some coin off it...most of my friends I've spoken to aren't terribly enthused about the T.O. visit and would rather head to Buffalo itself to watch a game.

- This probably doesn't make much sense, but for the first time playing Grand Theft Auto IV, I felt uncomfortable. Your character already has committed murder, theft, arson, drug trafficking, etc. but this mission involved kidnapping and would have a much different effect on my sense of good taste. You have to kidnap a mafia leader's daughter and take a photo of her while tied up to demand a ransom. But the "trick" is you have to have this person "look up" at you while you take a photo with your cell phone camera. And the only way to do it? You have to slap her. So you press the LB button when prompted, SLAP, and she looks up while cursing at you. Problem was, I took too long trying to line up the shot with the camera so she ended up looking down at the floor again, so LB button, SLAP, one more time. Ugh.

- FREE POLICE CHECK! Sign up to volunteer for the World Junior Hockey Championships, and they waive the fee to check your background making sure you aren't some hardened criminal

- Is it just me, or are the Olympics just no longer exciting? I remember looking forward to the Canada vs USA track meets in the 100m run and the 4 x 100 decathlon in particular. Does Canada even have anyone that can compete for the gold? I'm not so sure, but even then no one seems to be talking about the Olympics unless it involves boycotting it altogether in protest of China's human rights record.

- Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was unveiled at Cannes yesterday and the reviews have been solid. What can you say except SOLD!

- The Ottawa Senators have a 19 year-old Latvian draft prospect named Kaspar Daugavins. Is he any good? Apparently he was one of the few bright spots for the OHL's Toronto St. Micheal's Majors, and if the Senators and Eugene Melnyk want to expand their fanbase (and of course, they do), they should make every effort to see if this kid is good enough to make the club. The reason for this is that Latvia LOVES their hockey. Despite the fact they've never ranked higher than 10th in the World standings, one of the things that came out during the World Championships is that the fans are very passionate about the game and it is their #1 sport. Right now, they have no NHL player to call their own. Now what would happen if this Latvian guy made the Sens? You just transformed 2.2 million people into Senators fans.

Let me share you a story about how I graduated.

"Graduated" to a higher pants size, that is.

I wore a size 34 pants during the end of high school and during University. I went to Australia for 7 months and actually lost a bit of weight because I was always moving around, active, and didn't have big, luxurious meals. Despite that, I still remained a size 34.

When I got back from my trip, I started looking for work and when I did land my current job, I was put in a hotel in Toronto for 5 days a week for training and got to fly home for the weekend. While in the Big Smoke, all meals were paid for. I got something like a $45 dollar a day tax-free allowance for food and I didn't have to provide receipts. Sweet deal, for sure!

Problem was, me and my training group didn't exactly have salad while we were there. We'd always get together and go to restaurants, with the Keg being our favourite. What was the cost? Who cares, $45 a day! And right beside my hotel was this small cafe called Williams, and they had the BEST desserts. So right after dinner, a slice of cake was always in order.

Training lasted about 2 months, and I didn't notice anything until the first day I drove to work at my local Ottawa office, well, when I was just about to drive to work. My pants felt very uncomfortable, and as soon as I sat down, POP, the button holding my pants shot right across the car. Shit! It didn't help that none of my other pants were clean, so I went back to the house and put on a belt (I rarely put on a belt but now it's a regular part of my wardrobe) hoping it would hold up my non-buttoned pants. Luckily, it worked, and I then had to buy size 36 pants that night after going through my other pairs of slacks and figuring out none of them fit anymore.

And that's the end of my story.

This one play summed it all up for me.

I'm not sure why I'm so cynical, but I had my doubts about casting senior citizen Harrison Ford in the next Indiana Jones movie. How can he be sold as a legitimate superhero-type dodging bullets and leaping off trains when his bedtime is 8pm? I guess though his most recent body of work is the main reason. Since 1994's The Fugitive, has he really done anything memorable?

But, I finally saw the last trailer for Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and you know what? It looks like it's going to be okay. Steven Speilberg-o is ultimately the guy that will decide whether or not the movie will be any good and I'm convinced, solely by the trailer, he pulled it off. May 22nd...maybe I won't going to a midnight screening this time, but I'm looking forward to it. Check out the latest trailer by clicking here.

Don't worry mom, I won't put up a picture of you!

- Cara & Scott picked me up a sweet old school WWF glass with Demolition on it, in near mint condition. What can you say except: NICE!

- I'm wondering who the genius was that got Pittsburgh Penguins fans to wear white to their home games. The opposition wears white!

- I got tickets to the 2008 NHL entry draft. Is there anyone interested in going? You get to see young punks 15 years younger than you just before they sign contracts that will set them for life.

- Can't believe it's been three years since I moved downtown. Can't believe it'll be one year next month that I played in the World Series of Poker. I've kept a mental note on everyone that sponsored me, and if I can ever win one of these things, they'll get paid back with interest.

- The Ottawa Rapids changed their name to Rapidz after the owners of zip.ca bought the franchise. One word: Stupid. And where are my free tickets that were promised for entering the "name that team" contest?

- I filled out an application to volunteer for the 2009 World Junior Hockey Championships. Any interest? You can apply by clicking here. It would be nice if, as a thank you, they handed over some gold medal game tickets

- You think Sens fans are fickle? I've spoken to Habs fans who were coming up with trade scenarios involving rookie Carey Price

- If they ain't fickle, they're grumpy. Dany Heatley is having an unbelievable World Championship, and Sens fans are upset. Jason Spezza was demoted to the fourth line, and Sens fans are upset.

- I guess with everyone saying Dallas was tired after their seven periods of hockey on Sunday that they were in no condition to play against the Red Wings last night (and supports my theory a four-on-four and shootout should be added to shorten games), but c'mon, it's been four days. That's plenty of time to rest.

- Billy Idol is now opening for Def Leppard in August...that may be enough for me to go

- I've played so much GTA IV I can't see straight but according to the stats, I'm only 1/3 of the way through.

There are four teams remaining in the quest for the Stanley Cup this year, and there is one team in particular that I have no interest in seeing raise Lord Stanley.

And that is the Philadelphia Flyers.

I totally admit, I have financial interests in Philly beating the Pittsburgh Penguins to make some cash in one of my hockey pools, but really, I think the Flyers are the worst ambassador for the NHL.

There are a handful of skilled guys like Daniel Briere on the team, but for the most part, they are a bunch of dirty cheap shot artists that, for some reason, the referees tend to look the other way when deciding if they're going to be calling penalties.

Of course, some things can be so blatant things will be called, such as Derian Hatcher's elbow to the back of Francois Bouillon's head that almost cost the Flyers the game when Montreal scored two goals on the ensuing powerplay, but for the most part they get away with their shenanigans. And to me, it's just cheating, plain and simple.

I want to see skill win. I want to see some fast skating, crisp faces, nice dekes...solid hits are fine, but when the Flyers do it, most of the time the rulebook is thrown out the door.

Because one of the NHL's top stars in Sidney Crosby will be facing the Flyers, along with other skilled guys like Evgeni Malkin and Marian Hossa, I'm really hoping the referees will clamp down on the underhanded stuff and make sure none of those guys will get carried off on a stretcher before the series is done. And with pylons like Hatcher who are too slow to keep up with them, they compensate by trying to injure the opposition, and this must not happen.

I know I was a bit of a hypocrite wanting Montreal to lose to them, but, I've had enough. Go Penguins!

Thanks to Alex for letting me know about Trent Reznor & Co. decision to release yet another free download for their album entitled "The Slip." They released "Ghosts" in the same manner, however I wasn't a big fan of it as it was all instrumental and it appeared to be just an experiment more than anything. But, when it's $free.99, hey, who am I to complain?

So their latest offering falls in line with what I'm accustomed to with Nine Inch Nails' with the first couple of tracks I've listened to so far, so I'll give it a thumbs up. If you want to download it, go to this link:

Free NIN album!

What can you say except: NICE!

The coaching situation in Ottawa is something I look forward to seeing be resolved in the upcoming weeks as the NHL draft approaches in June (that will also take place in Ottawa).

Bryan Murray has said he'll just be GM and will actively seek a replacement for next season. And two names that intrigue me the most are both named Pat.

Pat Burns won a Stanley Cup behind the bench with the NJ Devils in 2003 (coaching that heartbreaking Conference finals where they toppled the Senators in seven games) and commands respect with every player in the NHL. He's also coached the Montreal Canadiens and Toronto Maple Leafs, and has a reputation for being tough on his players to get the best out of them on the ice. Add to the fact he also has a semi-connection with the city of Ottawa, being a former police officer for Hull, hmm, looks like a good fit. He's been out of coaching since being diagnosed with cancer, but he beat it and wants to do it again. He's my personal choice to be head coach of the Sens.

However, another candidate that will bring a little more drama to the fold is ex-coach and GM of the Toronto Maple Leafs, Pat Quinn. No, he hasn't won a Stanley Cup, but he has won a couple of gold medals in the Olympics and World Cup. He's another guy that puts the whip to his players and has a reputation of using the media to his advantage to better his teams' odds. But aside from this, it would send a dagger to the heart of many Leafs fans seeing Quinn coach their arch-nemesis: The Battle of Ontario adds another tale to its storied history. The only thing that may scare Murray from hiring him is that Quinn is somewhat power-hungry, and might threaten his GM post much like when Murray took over from John Muckler.

In addition (and I admit, this could be a reach), if Quinn is hired, can he attract any new talent to the Ottawa organization? I think it's possible...why not after being hired, he picks up the phone and calls up his former team captain Mats Sundin. "Toronto wanted you traded, no extension offered for next season? How about a trip up the 416 to play for me like old times?"

I couldn't imagine anything sweeter.

Well, that's a slight exaggeration, but let's just say after my first sitting of Grand Theft Auto IV, it's very easy to lose track of time. I mean, it's just THAT good.

Yup, it's violent, bloody, profane, and women are pretty much just treated like sex objects (you can freely go to a strip club and pay $50 for lap dances with the option of viewing at multiple angles. Hey, I'm just telling you what's in it!) but aside from this, you have a very well thought out video game. And how they crammed everything onto one disc is beyond comprehension: The graphics are just so dazzling, I spent the first couple of hours only sporadically completing the main missions, as just walking around the cities created by the people at Rockstar is enough to keep you entertained. They added a lot of great features; simple things, like being able to summon a cab and either enjoy the ride from the backseat or press a button to skip the scenery and head to your destination gives you more power to have fun with the game at a pace you see fit.

Grand Theft Auto IV is a pop culture phenom. I have no doubts a part V and a movie project will be heading our way to cash in on what the video game market has embraced. Kids shouldn't play it though, I even feel a tad guilty at some of things that go on (although, believe it or not, it's actually not as bad as the PS2 game San Andreas).

So yeah, looks like a lot of my spare time has already been spoken for. Hopefully I'll find the strength to tear myself away from my Xbox controller and get some fresh air or something!

The work-lunch debate reared it's ugly head today with some of my colleagues bringing up a topic very political in nature, so the chance to offend presented itself. I don't think anyone was offended with the discussion, but having said that, I felt like the only one with a differing opinion than everyone else.

There's this restaurant in Philadelphia called Geno's who won the right to leave a sign posted there that reads: "This is America - When ordering, please speak English."

Can you feel the love in the air?

A lot of my colleagues liked the fact this Italian restaurant owner, Joey Vinto, "stood up" for us "everyday people" because we seem to bend over backwards in our political correctness to not offend anyone. How many times have I heard you can't say "Merry Christmas" during the holidays to a client over the phone just in case they're an atheist? Can we go to far? Sometimes I feel this way. But this sign that's up, I don't know, the perception to me is that it spreads hate.

Put it this way: Pretend you decided to visit Japan. You want to go to a restaurant. Pasted right on the door as you're about to enter it reads, "This is Japan. Speak Japanese when ordering." Well, yikes, thanks for the welcome. I want to appreciate your culture by sampling what I understand is fine cuisine, but since I didn't take a Japanese course before heading over, I've lost the "right" to place an order? If you heard signs like that we're posted there, would you want to visit? Would you think the Japanese are nothing but a bunch of uppity pricks? I would. And I'd visit elsewhere. What kind of message is America sending when our world neighbors read news like that?

What happened to just wanting to help out your neighbor? If I owned a restaurant, and someone wanted to place an order that couldn't speak English, I'd try to help. I'd point to pictures, I'd show them the menu, I don't know...not only do I think it's just plain good manners, I'm going to make some money off this deal when they pay me for the food about to be ordered.

Anyway, both Canada and the Unites States are a nation of immigrants, and there was a time when the owner of Geno's restaurant had grandparents who, when they set off to the United States for greener pastures, they probably couldn't speak any English either. It took them time to eventually learn it (and I don't debate the fact that anyone who wants to emigrate to another country should take the time to learn one of the official languages) but my point is it seems that the sign posted is somewhat hypocritical. We all have struggles. We all at one point needed a hand to get by. "English Only" in my opinion might as well read "F*ck You".