Thursday, November 09, 2006

So what exactly do you do?

I actually feel sorry for GM John Muckler right now. At first, the Senators problems seemed to be a lack of offence. The goals against were respectable, they just had problems burying their chances.

Now that Ottawa regained a bit of their scoring touch, I have now witnessed some of the worst defense the Senators have played in the approximate decade I have been a fan. Last night definitely took the cake: My favourite was the first powerplay of the game, where Wade Redden managed to tackle Joe Corvo at the blueline which led to an Atlanta breakaway and a short-handed goal.

But there were other doozies. How about Andrej Meszaros' careless puck clearing over the boards during an Atlanta powerplay, which then led to a 5-on-3 goal?

Or how about Anton Volchenkov's decision to carry the puck (when have you ever seen this guy stickhandle?) that led to a turnover in the neutral zone and the game-winning goal for the Thrashers?

So now what? If you're Muckler do you go after a new defenceman and give up a forward who seem already too pressed? Or do you go after a Craig Conroy-type player and give up someone like a Volchenkov, depleting the D even more?

Is it a coaching thing? Has Bryan Murray, with only one season with the Senators, already lost the players that play for him?

Or do you open the office door and give a Vince McMahon "YOU'RE FIRRRRREEDDDDD!!!!" to John Muckler? Remember, doing that doesn't change the roster that has them in 13th place in the Eastern Conference. It just seems every so-called solution brings a new problem.

Anyway, maybe the boys can turn things around (and they are boys, they are the 2nd youngest team in the league). Or maybe this is just what failed playoff after failed playoff will bring after being touted a favourite for the last few years.

Like an idiot, I'm going to tune in to tomorrow's Penguins again and see Sydney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin light up Gerber like a Christmas tree (Ray Emery is apparently still injured). I have to give the Senators credit for this: None of their games have been boring. They lose with style, and nearly all of their games have only been lost by one goal. But they're still losses. Sigh. Oh well. Man, why do I care about this so much???

Comments:
I dunno who to fire. Maybe they're just in a slump and need to get back to fundamentals. Here are my recommendations:

1) No fewer than four passes before you shoot.

2) Develop some attack style, similar to the Flying V.

3) Modify the arms-spread-like-wings, one-legged-kick-to-the-chin called the Crane Kick into some form of move to do after winning a faceoff.

4) Don't worry about Emery's injury. It's the start of the second act, he's gotta get hurt doing something stupid, learn a life lesson extremely quickly, and then come back for a dramatic run at the impossible.

5) Don't get too hung up on stupid penalties. Keep the following in mind: "Then you go to le box for 2 minutes by yourself... and you feel shame... then you get free. "

If movies have taught me anything, it's that this combination of tips and tricks are sure to work.
 
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