The SBP Archives - Your less than frequent dose of SBP!

Before today, the chances of me going to the theatre to see Clerks II were quite slim. I liked the original, wasn't it's biggest fan or anything, and it wasn't exactly the type of film people were demanding a sequel for. It looked like it would be a bunch of inside jokes only director Kevin Smith's most loyal fanboys would understand, which didn't work for me in Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back.

But, then I read an article about Good Morning America's film critic Joel Siegel walking out of the screening for Clerks II. In case you aren't familiar with Joel Siegel's film critiques, he is absolutely horrible and just LOVES to thrown down the puns in his reviews. He pretty much raves about any big Hollywood film and loathes anything remotely edgy. Anyway, he caused a big scene when leaving Clerks II. Apparently he blurted out something along the lines of, "Time to go, first ****ing movie I've walked out of in 30 years!" about 40 minutes into the film.

Kevin Smith heard about it, and he was none too pleased. In fairness to Siegel, Kevin Smith doesn't take criticism of his work too well, but his response on his blog was pretty funny. We'll see if it's funnier than the film itself:

Getting a bad review from Siegel is like a badge of honor. This is the guy who stole his mustachioed-critic shtick from Gene Shalit years ago, and still refuses to give it back. This is a guy who seemingly prides himself on his own nyuk-nyuk wordplay. For 'Pirates 2,' he made us all titter with 'Yo, Ho, Ho and a Bottle of Fun' . . . He made us squeal with delight when he wrote, 'Wheelie Good Time for "Cars." ' I mean, Fozzy [bleeping] Bear laughs at this guy."

"I don't need Joel Siegel to [bleep] my [bleep] the way he apparently [bleeps] M. Night Shyamalan's, gushing over his flick ['The Lady in the Water'] before he's even seen it, but [bleep] man, man - how about a little common [bleeping] courtesy? You never, never disrupt a movie, simply because you don't like it. Cardinal rule of moviegoing: Shut your [bleeping] mouth while the movie's playing.

"I don't come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like, ' "Shark Tale" Is a Halibut Good Time' - so don't [bleep] with my stuff while it's still screening . . . What are you, a 12-year-old boy cutting loose with your pals at a Friday night screening of 'Scary Movie' 4' while your parents are in a theater down the hall watching 'The Devil Wears Prada'? Leave the diva-like behavior and drama-queen antics to the movie stars, not the movie reviewer, ya' rude-ass [bleep]."